The Mayor of Tipton vows to visit the glorious Democratic Republic of North Korea

The Mayor and Fanny

Today, it was announced in Tipton's premier newspaper, 'The Tipton Bugle, incorporating parts of Netherton North and South Dudley environs', that the Right Honourable Mayor of Tipton, the esteemed Enoch Vowel will be embarking on a fact finding mission to the glorious Democratic Republic of North Korea. Mr Vowel was quick to reassure Tipton rate payers, saying: "I would like to reassure Tipton rate payers by saying that this trip will be fully covered by Council funds."

Mr Vowel will be accompanied by his voluptuous secretary, Miss Fanny Akimbo. Miss Akimbo is hoping to learn how to use Microsoft Word whilst in North Korea.

As a good will gesture, Mr Vowel will take along the entire population of the Tipton dog pound. The dogs will find refuge and heaven at Pyongyang's only restaurant, 'The Dog's Bollocks'. Let's take a look at today's menu:

ALL FOOD ACCOMPANIED BY FRIED LICE

Lab on a stick

Fido fries

Pooch and Prawn (sans prawn)

Lassie never came home fries

Hot dogs

Poodle noodles

Chow mein

Bichon fries

Spaghetti bolognese

Egg and chips

A 'dogy bag ' is always available.

Mr Vowel is expected to enter into high powered talks with North Korea's glorious leader: Kim Dim Sum. Topics on the agenda are likely to include discussions on Tipton’s appalling human rights record and the burgeoning stray dog problem. Arse.